Weight Loss for the past 4 days

Friday, July 29, 2011



I am down a total of 4 pounds. That is a pound a day. My goal is to be 184 by August 12th.


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Weight Loss for the past 3 days

Thursday, July 28, 2011


7-28-2011 : I'm down 2 pounds

7-27-2011: I'm down 0.6 pounds


7-26-2011: Start weight 198.2



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Weight Loss

Wednesday, July 27, 2011


 

I'm on my journey to weight loss again. I can't believe that I let myself get this heavy, oh yes, I can, because I like to eat. But for health reasons I need to lose weight, because I'm insulin resistance.



Better Ideal Weight - body calculations: http://www.halls.md/ideal-weight/body.htm



I rather used this calculation to give me a more realistic weight of what I should be. My goal is to be 150 by the end of the year!

Please enter your Weight, Height, Age and Gender, then Click the Calculate Button. 
Weight: 198.2 lbs
Height:   5'4 
Age: 36 years 
Gender:  
View the Calculation Results Below:
Peoples Choice Ideal Weight:
150lbs
This shows the average weight that other people of your Age, Height, Weight and Gender would describe as their ideal weight.
Women tend to imagine their ideal weight is unrealistically low, so they diet unnecessarily. Men tend to allow their ideal weight to be higher than medically recommended. Men and Women should learn from each other.
 
Medical Recommendation 111-146 lbs
This recommendation is based on a Body Mass Index (BMI) range of 19-25.
Medical evidence suggests that all body weights within this range are reasonably equally healthy (for people of your height). Outside this range, health risks may occur.
Your current Body Mass Index is 34 kg/m2
Use a combination of the above results, to set your own personal goal.

Other results are described below for completeness, but they aren't recommended.
Metropolitan Life tables: 127-141 lbs
for frame size
This range was taken from the Height and Weight look-up tables created by the Metropolitan Life Insurance company in 1979.
The use of the Met Life tables is very prevalent on the internet, Most websites label them incorrectly as an "ideal" range. However, the values are too large for short people, and laughably wrong for tall people. They have no Age modifiers, and the definition of frame size is too hard to understand.
 
Other IBW formulas: 121
Dr. BJ Devine created formulas in 1974. Dr. JD Robinson and Dr. DR Miller modified the formulas slightly in 1983. Use:

The Devine formulas were initially developed to set certain medication doses based on body weight and height. Over time, their use has spread beyond their intended purpose.
I suggest you use the Devine formula if you are a man or use the Robinson formula if you are a woman.



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Love is Not Enough...The Making of a Relationship

Tuesday, July 26, 2011



Love is Not Enough...
The Making of a Relationship

by Bill Malone, MSW, LISW

Reference at :  http://www.canville.net/malone/lovenotenough.html
 
“Love doesn’t just sit there, like a stone, it has to be made, like bread, remade all the time, made new…, all the time, made new…” Amy E. Dean

We think that the hardest thing in a relationship is finding the right person. After that, we fall in love and live happily ever after, right? Those in a relationship know all too well that fairy tales are only true in the movies. The truth of the matter is that having and maintaining a relationship is not easy. The rate of divorce tells us that love is not enough; other factors are needed to keep a relationship going.

As a therapist, I am privileged to work with many couples who come for help with their relationship problems. Looking back, it would be safe to say that the major problem that brings a couple in for counseling is because one or both of the parties are at their wits end and are seriously wanting out of the relationship unless some major change occurs. In working with couples, I don’t see that any one is at fault. Rather, the problems are usually caused by faulty interactions that have gone on for so long that the root cause for the problems are unknown to the couple. It is interesting to note that women tend to call for assistance more frequently than men do, but I believe this has to do with the fact that males have been socialized to be tough and handle all problems. Women on the other hand are reared to ask for assistance. Men need to learn to ask for help.
Communication problems are a major source for relationship problems. People in most cases just do not know how to talk to each other. Usually, the couple has spent years arguing, fighting or even avoiding problems, but the inevitable occurs, someone reaches the end of their rope. Loss of trust, confusion over whether we still love each other, fights all the time and the inability to agree on anything are some of the cues to recognize that a relationship is having serious communication problems. Many times a child’s misbehavior and conduct problems at home or school are directly related to a couple’s inability to communicate.
The goal of the counseling process is to teach the couple specific skills that are essential in keeping a relationship alive and growing. Many times the couples that I have seen had a deficit in one or more of the essential ingredients needed to cook up a great relationship. I don’t want to mislead anyone, love is important to a relationship. It is the catalyst that gets the whole thing going, but the following are ingredients that keep the love alive and the relationship healthy.


TWO MATURE INDIVIDUALS
A mature individual is defind as a person who has a sense of self. He/she is able to recognize that both members in the relationship are different. They are able to see that each has a different heritage, a different way of thinking, feeling and possibly different beliefs. The mature person is able to recognize the I, Me and the Us in the relationship. With all the differences in personalities, thoughts and feelings, it’s a wonder that we got together in the first place.
Without the element of maturity, a couple can get all messed up just because they lose themselves in a relationship. They can become jealous, dependent, resentful and distant. All of which can erode the reason the couple became a couple in the first place.


GOOD COMMUNICATION SKILLS
The ability to tell each other thoughts, feelings and wants is so important to a relationship. Good, open, and honest communication is like oil to a car. Without oil in the car, internal parts will burn up and the car will be ready for the scrap pile. Communication is important!
There are no mind readers. For a relationship to grow and prosper, likes, dislikes, desires, hopes, dreams and problems need to be said. If a couple’s communication is restricted, the relationship is destined for major problems down the road. We take cars for oil changes to keep them going strong, why not seek a professional’s assistance to change our communication patterns in order to keep the relationship in tip top shape just like our automobiles?


THE ABILITY TO CHANGE
Relationships are not static. They are ever changing. If they become static for too long, they can become extinct like the dinosaurs. Relationships go through a life cycle: the honeymoon, with children, mid-life crisis, the empty nest and the reacquainting period and then death of a spouse and the end of the relationship. All of these stages require change, learning and exploration of new territory. If one or both members in the relationship becomes rigid and resistant to needed changes the relationship could end in divorce. In my opinion, one of the major reasons that couples end in divorce is because they were unable to change to meet the new needs and demands of the relationship. One or both were unable or unwilling to make the needed changes to keep the relationship growing; as a result, the relationship died. Change we must, it is part of the human condition. If it was not, we would all still be infants in diapers.


ABILITY TO COMPROMISE
The ability to compromise refers to an individual’s willingness and proficiency at finding the middle ground. Being able to compromise is a sign of maturity. It is also needed in any relationship. If one person always gets his/her way, the other person is bound to feel dominated, and resentful. These negative feelings can rip the heart right out of any relationship. Finding the happy middle can provide the best of both worlds… giving and receiving. Sharing the last dish of ice cream with a friend is always better than eating it all alone, isn’t it?


A WILLINGNESS TO WORK TOGETHER
A relationship is like a business partnership; it has common goals, assets and liabilities. Like in a business, if members don’t work together, the business will become ineffective and possibly not exist for too long. The ability to work together means recognizing each person’s strengths and helping them come out at the same time recognizing each member’s weaknesses and learning to turn weaknesses into assets. Two heads are better than one and if couples follow this rule, they will see that the deep depressing valleys that lie ahead may be nothing more than pot holes once they approach them.


KNOWING WHEN TO BACK OFF
Every one needs room to breath, room to sort out their own thoughts, feelings and problems. If someone is always hanging on you, there is a tendency to want to push them off to reduce the burden of carrying them all the time. Providing individual spaces gives any individual the ability to see things more clearly.


SUPPORT AND TRUST
One of the benefits of a relationship is that we will have someone in our corner to support us and to affirm our existence. This support adds to the trust that is needed in any relationship. Without mutual support, a trusting relationship will not develop. Each member must have its emotional needs met in order to continue to invest in the relationship. The continued support and the being there for the other person emotionally is the way in which trust is developed. If a trusting relationship is cultivated and maintained, the ability to try new adventures and take new risks are enhanced. A supportive trusting relationship outside of the bedroom always increases the activity in the bedroom.


LOVE, HUGS, KISSES AND LOVEMAKING
The open expression of feeling in any relationship is vital to the continued growth of the relationship. Lovemaking should not be overlooked in a relationship, but it need not be the only ingredient that exists in a relationship either. Lovemaking is the icing on the cake and it gets there by mixing all of the above mentioned ingredients.
Good lovemaking starts outside of the bedroom. If you want to increase the frequency and intensity of your lovemaking, try to increase the frequency and intensity of your communication, willingness to work as a team, sharing of self, being kind and supportive, give space and freedom to explore individual interests. All of these ingredients will add to the makings of a fine, wonderfully iced cake.


A WORD ABOUT RELATIONSHIPS
If you are in a relationship and are experiencing some problems and don’t know what to do, a trained professional can provide you with:
  • Support
  • A listening ear
  • Directions
  • Guidance
  • Communication Training
You owe it to yourself and your mate to find answers to your struggles. Remember, no one is trained on how to have a great relationship, so we are bound to run into problems.

“A man is wise and strong who recognizes he has a problem and seeks out a solution rather than see the problem and stick his head in the sand.”
Bill Malone, MSW, LISW




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DIY: Bedpost Repair

Monday, July 25, 2011




I purchased the Super Glue Gel from the Dollar Store. A great investment!


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TGIF: Love Yourself

Friday, July 22, 2011


Have a wonderful, safe and blessed weekend!!



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I Blog Therefore I Am

Thursday, July 21, 2011


I know that I need to get better about blogging everyday. Really what was the purpose of me even starting a blog in the first place. So today I have decided from here on out that I WILL POST A BLOG EVERYDAY, excluding vacations and emergencies. I started this blog to be more open with myself with the things that I do in life. Come on Dee, get it together **that is what I have to keep telling myself** Well enough of me rambling.. Back to work. Have a wonderful day!!!


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Bar Hopping: Blu Bar and End Zone

Wednesday, July 20, 2011




Last night I decided to go bar hopping. I ended up at the Blu Bar and End Zone. This is my first time going to the Blu Bar, so I really didn't know what to expect. When I got to the door, the guy was like $5 to get in. I'm thinking to myself, I'm NOT about to pay to get into a bar, especially downtown when you have so many other options. So as my friend and I was walking away he called us back and was like it was free for us. As I entered the bar, all that was there was mainly dudes, **thinking to myself, I should have came with my girls***. Inside the bar the lighting was blue (oh course), projection screen TV and they had a DJ. We sat at the bar and I had a Sex on the Beach and he had a Long Island Ice Tea, both drinks $3 each. Not a bad deal, the bartender who I think her name was Patricia or Patrice , her husband owns the club said that on Tuesday, they have drink specials from 8-10 for $3. I asked if they served food, but she said no, because they didn't have a kitchen. I wanted some wings, so we finished our drinks and I told Patrica that I would be coming back since during the week, they have different events going on.

Since I wanted some wings, we ended up at the End Zone, I'm thinking it's packed, because I see all the cars outside, so I was like okay this is going to be a good crowd. As we entered the door, I was thinking to myself, I think everyone in here drove there own car **do people not car pool any more**LOL. But on a side note I had fun, they had karaoke and I was able to get my laugh on. I will be going back to the End Zone on Tuesday night.

I was home by 12, so I got just enough sleep.




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Life is hard, but so very beautiful

Thursday, July 14, 2011


When I saw this picture, all I could do is think about my life and where I am at in it. I have made some bad decisions in my life and most likely will make some more (I'm only human). At the end of the day, I can say that I love myself and my life. My past is what made me the person I am today!



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Oprah Determines Success

Thursday, July 7, 2011

1.
Dont let others define you or tell you what you can’t do.
Oprah Winfrey said: “Nobody had any clue that my life could be anything but working in some factory or a cotton field in Mississippi. Nobody.” For her entire life people have been telling Winfrey what she can’t do— and why. But Winfrey hasn’t listened to them. Rather, she says, she listens to her own instincts. “Gut [instinct] is what got me where I am today,” she said in 1998.

2.
Take responsibility for your life.
That doesn’t mean you have to absolve others of wrongdoing if you’ve experienced that in your life. It just means you still have to overcome it. As a victim of sexual abuse, Oprah Winfrey had the triggers that have led countless others to drug and alcohol addictions. But Winfrey wasn’t looking to check out from life; she was looking to lead a productive and fulfilling life. She took responsibility for how her life would turn out. “I think of myself as somebody who from an early age knew I was responsible for myself, and I had to make good,” she said.

3.
Embrace God.
Oprah Winfrey said: “There’s only one way I’ve been able to survive being raped, molested…only one way to cope with fears of pregnancy, my mother on welfare…my faith in God got me through.” Reading the Bible has been part of Winfrey’s everyday routine. She has said: “I act as if everything depends upon me and pray as if everything depends on God.”

4.
Have compassion for others.
Winfrey had a compassion she just couldn’t, and maybe didn’t want to, hide. While this was considered a “negative” for a news anchor by her bosses, it proved to be one of her great strengths as a talk show host.

5.
Study the competition.
When Winfrey was starting out, Phil Donahue was the king of the talk shows. “I watched Phil every day to see what I could learn,” she said.

6.

Just be yourself.

Winfrey’s genius lay in just being herself. She said, “My head hurts when I have to be in any situation where people are being phony. So if I can’t be myself and take my shoes off when my feet hurt, then I’m not going to do very well.”

7.
Live your life with passion.
Winfrey’s audience could see that from the start she was engaged in something she loved when she was doing her show. “I’m a person who lives my life with great passion, and I think that comes across on camera. …I believe you’re here to live your life with passion. Otherwise, you’re just traveling through the world blindly—and there’s no point in that.”

8.
Pursue quality in your work first—money will follow.
Pursue the work you love, which allows you to do it to the best of your ability. It is only then that money will follow. Today Winfrey’s net worth is estimated at around one billion dollars, making her one of the wealthiest women in the world. But the pursuit of money was never her objective, only the pursuit of quality. “Part of the reason why I am as successful as I have been [is] because success wasn’t the goal. The process was. I wanted to do good work,” she said.

9.
Have a generous heart.
After the murder of four-year-old Angelica Mena at the hands of a convicted child abuser, Winfrey hired former Illinois governor James Thompson to draft a 1aw that would create a national registry of people convicted of child abuse. Winfrey then lobbied hard for it. In December 1993, the National Child Protection Act, which was nicknamed the “Oprah Bill,” became law. Winfrey has also used her wealth to give her family better quality of life and to help needy and worthy stu dents attend college on scholarships, in addition to other numerous charitable causes. “Education is freedom, and that is one way you can make a huge differ ence in someone’s life,” she said.

10.
Read.
As a little girl, Winfrey could almost always be found with a book in her hand. Reading brought her comfort and perspective, especially when she was young and troubled. “Books showed me there were possibilities in life, that there were actually people like me living in a world I could not only aspire to but attain. Reading gave me hope. For me, it was the open door.”

11.
Continue to grow—personally and professionally.
By 1990 Winfrey decided that her topics, which had helped bring her to the top, were for the most part too frivolous. She wanted to do shows of more substance that made a difference in people’s lives. By growing as a host, Winfrey has stayed influential and relevant. “I want to use television not only to entertain, but to help people lead better lives. I realize now, more than ever, that the show is the best way to accomplish these goals,” she said.

12.
Guard against hypocrisy.
In January 1995, during a show that dealt with a guest talking about her drug use, Winfrey admitted her own drug use when she was in her early twenties. She called it her “great shame.” She said: “I would have felt like a hypocrite, not saying [I had smoked cocaine], talking to people about baring their souls and standing there like I didn’t know what they were talking about.” Regarding her relationship with her half-sister, Patricia Lee, who sold the tabloids the story of Winfrey’s teenage pregnancy and her premature baby’s subse quent death, Winfrey said: “I didn’t feel I could continue to go on the air speaking to people about forgiveness if I couldn’t do it myself. There was a lot of pain, a lot of stuff let out. But I did it so that we could go on and live with each other.”

13.
Strive to be the best.
“The greatest contribution you can make to women’s rights, to civil rights, is to be the absolute…best at what you do,” Winfrey said.

In 1989, in a speech to the American Women’s Economic Development Corporation, Oprah Winfrey listed her personal ten commandments. This list appears in Oprah Winfrey Speaks: Insight from the World’s Most influential Voice, by Janet Lowe.

Oprah Winfrey’s
Ten Commandments
for Success

1. Don’t live your life to please others.
2. Don’t depend on forces outside of yourself to get ahead.
3. Seek harmony and compassion in your business and personal life.
4. Get rid of the backstabbers—surround yourself only with people who will lift you higher.
5. Be nice.
6. Rid yourself of your addictions—whether they are food, alcohol, drugs or behavior habits.
7. Surround yourself with people who are as smart or smarter than you.
8. If money is your motivation, forget it.
9. Never hand over your power to someone else.
10. Be persistent in pursuing your dreams

On May 30, 1997, Oprah Winfrey gave the commence ment address to Wellesley College, in Wellesley, Massachusetts. “She told the graduates that she’d learned five important lessons that made her life better,” Janet Lowe wrote. Winfrey said:

* Life is a journey. Everyday experiences will teach you who you really are.

* When people show you who they are, believe them the first time. This is especially helpful with men. Don’t force them to beat you over the head with the message.

* Turn your wounds into wisdom. Everyone makes mis takes. They are just God’s way of telling you you’re moving in the wrong direction.

* Be grateful. Keep a daily journal of the things you are thankful for. It will keep you focused on the abun dance in your life.

* Create the highest, grandest vision possible for your life because you become what you believe.



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Fantasia Barrino Performs During the 2011 Essence Festival

Tuesday, July 5, 2011



A lot of people are wondering why Fantasia is gaining weight. Is she pregnant or just eating good are the questions. Well Fantasia is gaining weight for one of her biggest acting roles of her carrier. She will be playing Mahalia Jackson in a movie on the Gospel singer's storied life. There are still rumors that she is pregnant by her boyfriend Autwaun Cook. I guess only time will tell. Either way I am happy that she is playing role of Mahalia Jackson.





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Happy 4th of July

Monday, July 4, 2011






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